I’m sure there is no person in the world who never lied.
by Anushka of The Glowing Heart
Photo from Carmella Fernando’s flickr
People lie for many reasons. To hide their guilt, to protect someone, not to hurt someone’s feelings, not to cause a fight.
I’ve been lied to a lot of times by many people. Mostly by those who didn’t care about my feelings nor being fair to me. So I started thinking about my lies.
I know how to lie and how to make everyone believe it, but I don’t like to do it. Lying is stressful and requires next lies for a case to cover the previous one. What about if I forget about my lie and someone catches me on it? It won’t be a nice situation for both sides.
Every lie, sooner or later, comes out. So what for lying? I believe it’s better to say the truth and deal with consequences instead of lying and stressing yourself and get into more trouble.
But is it always good? Sometimes not telling the truth will save someone else from being hurted or sad. Sometimes lying is bad and sometimes is good? It’s a little bit confusing.
If someone doesn’t ask me about something I don’t say it myself if it’s not necessary. Is it lying? I don’t think so. Some information are better to be kept only for myself.
I think lying can be bad or good depending on situation. But from the other side we can lie saying we do it not to hurt someone’s feelings. There is a thin line between good and bad lying and this is needed not to cross the ‘good side’ line.
What “white” lie have you used?
More from Anushka in The Glowing Heart.
Moment Matters 
Thank you for sharing my thoughts. It means a lot 🙂
You’re welcome 🙂
I used to be a compulsive lier.
I would lie when I didn’t need to.
These days I’m very different.
These days it’s not good for me to do it.
Makes me sick & crazy.
I endorse your views fully on the topic. If one has to lie for the good others, it is a thousand times better than the truth that hurts a person.
Writers lie all the time. Fiction, right? Lying only when it’s for the best…
Lieing is part of a collection of bad social deeds. If it is analysed on its own, it absolves the person from other abuses of a person. Not telling someone something that could help them, or information that is their due and right to hear is not a lie, but it is a bad deed. I have lied in the past and have learned from it. I have a poor memory so lieing would never have been possible on an ongoing basis. The impulse to lie doesn’t go away, thus the reasoning around good lies, but as a person continues to tell the truth, with concideration for the listener (the manner of communication – brutal/caring/accurate/vague/their opinion/views – is a deed in itself), they find their opinion valued by the people they care about. That alone would be worth a persons approach to communication.
Telling a story for entertainment is not a lie, by the way, and is as much a part of the human condition as the impulse to shape reality to suit oneself, or the impulse to lie.
Positions of power tend to leave the person in that position with the option of telling a lie to help people. In these cases the people who established the position and have expectations of it, need to be examined. If people accept a lie that suits them, there should be no complaining after that point.
I think lying can be seductive and addictive. It’s important not to fall sway to its siren song. Small lies can easily build and the act can become habit.
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I don’t lie often. I’m more of a “withholder of information” but it’s not like people are questioning me.
I work with kids and it’s very hard to teach them about how they should not lie but that they also shouldn’t tell someone their drawing is ugly. I usually try and tell them that there has to be at least one thing you like about the picture and to focus on that. That’s what I do when they show me their pictures and what not. But yeah, it’s hard to teach because we can accept, as adults, that rationalizations will conflict but kids, not so much.
Yes, probably would use a “good lie” or I wouldn’t say anything at all … it all depends, I don’t think we have to be bold and truthful in all situations, it can cause pain .. when not needed. I think we all have use a “white lie” in our life.
The biggest lie. “I won’t ever lie again!”
I am mother’s full time nurse for home care hospice. She is terminal advanced stage 4 cancer. When not drugged with pain pill she is awake, lucid and alert. I have not given her the details but merely have told her she is very sick (as she certainly knows) and that her husband and I will remain by her side. I don’t think this is a lie by omission as no one can accurately predict her life’s ending.
I don’t know how to lie. Sometimes I wish I did. It’s written on my face that I’m lying, even if I don’t want to hurt someone’s feelings who asks me if I like their new haircut. I’m a disgrace, right? Can’t even lie if I have to. However, I have been lied to, and it didn’t feel good. I’d rather the truth, even if it hurts my feelings. As far as Carl’s mom goes, I don’t see a lie anywhere in there. In fact, he’s a good son, promising to be by his mom’s side. Hugs to you Carl.
Lying is easy to do but hard to cover up.
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I try not to lie, but sometimes it’s unavoidable. For example, if you’re pissed with someone, but you know that you don’t really have a good reason to be, and they ask you what’s wrong. What are you supposed to say? “Yeah, I’m angry with you, but I don’t know why”? That will just make them angry/upset, and there’s nothing to gain. Better to lie, say you’re fine, and try to get over it.
Good or Bad, it’s still lying, there’s no difference
Really Good One…I am always felt guilty when I lie….which was always ” good lie”.
I lie when it is necessary, and I think I’m good at handling it.
This is a huge philosophical subject :). I wrote a post about it on my blog and referenced your post in it
Thanks for raising this topic – it’s interesting to me from an entrepreneur or salesman’s point of view, where there might be fine line between lying and fudging the truth / not disclosing important details – whether it’s ethical or not is another question obviously! Like the previous poster, I wrote about this on my blog here.
Lying isn’t “good” but…sometimes, it’s easier to just come up with a little lie or just simply keep something to ourselves than tell the truth. Everyone lies at some point, you can’t avoid it. Sometimes, a little lie can help you from hurting or disappointing someone you care about, other times…you just have to because you’re scared of how the other person is going to react. 🙂